Today's entry comes to you courtesy of Paul Revere and the Raiders. Often derided as popstar buffoons attired in silly Revolutionary War outfits, the Raiders actually kicked ass on several levels, and this tune, The Great Airplane Strike, proves it by dropping a super-heavy slab of fuzzed-out guitar stomp right on our pointy, little heads.

There was a reason why the Sex Pistols covered these guys.

[Link: The Great Airplane Strike]

Thanks to some excellent cinematic detective work by film restoration expert, Alain Silver, the real ending to this dark masterpiece has finally been uncovered, and the equally excellent Noir of the Week weblog has the scoop.

[Link: The Restoration of Kiss Me Deadly]

In a recent e-mail discussion with my friend, Kosmonaut, regarding what would constitute an appropriate tiki drink for a large group of people, I'd suggested going with a classic bowl drink like the Scorpion, and multiplying the ingredients to serve the requisite number of imbibers.

Consequently, I had Scorpions on the brain all day today, so I opened up my copy of Beachbum Berry's Sippin' Safari to the Kelbo's Scorpion recipe, and started tweaking away down in the basement bar. The result can be seen there on the left, and I have dubbed it "Scorpion Rising". No, it's not a tribute to the films of Kenneth Anger, just the cleverest play on words that I could come up with in my semi-inebriated state.

As I said, the Scorpion is a bowl drink, meant to serve 2. Unfortunately, I have yet to locate a Tiki bowl to add to my collection, so I pulled my large Disney World Polynesian Village goblet down off the shelf to serve in it's place.

The recipe is doubled from the Bum's, and I've added several additional ingredients (I'll let you guess which ones). With the addition of a bit more ice, this could've filled a small bowl quite nicely and served 3-4 aloha-shirted, fez-bedecked hipsters (like me!) equipped with long straws.

1 1/2 oz. Fresh-squeezed Lime Juice
1 1/2 oz. Fresh-squeezed (or not) Orange Juice
1 1/2 oz. Brandy (V.S.O.P.)
1 oz. Gin (Hendrick's)
2 oz. Dark Rum (Cruzan Blackstrap)
1 oz. Trader Vic's Passionfruit Syrup
1 oz. Orgeat Syrup
2 tsp. Pimento (Allspice) Liqueur (Berry Hill)
1/8 tsp. Absinthe (Mr. Jekyll)
2 dashes of Fee Bros. Peach Bitters

Add all ingredients to a cocktail shaker half-filled with crushed ice. Shake vigorously, then pour into a large goblet or bowl. Add more crushed ice to fill. Garnish with beak flower.

The resulting drink is smooth, light, and thanks to the Absinthe and bitters, quite aromatic, but it has a serious bite that sneaks up on your about a half-hour later, so don't go making 3 or 4 of these and pounding them all by yourself!

Okay, celebration's over. I've got another ten pounds to lose...

Thanks, Mom!

I am a monster.
My girlfriend is a monster.
Everyone we know is a monster, so let's do a monster-specific dance.
I'm being chased by a werewolf.
I have had a spell cast on me.
Where did all my blood go?

The Ghoul then goes on to add a new topic to his repertoire: Let's sing a song about hilariously inaccurate television psychics.

Criswell Predicts tells the story behind Mae West's stirring hoochie-koochie paean to her psychic friend, the Amazing Criswell, who, as you may recall, predicted that Mae would not only become President of the United States in 1960, but would also accompany him to the Moon (along with Liberace).

It's a great song, and a terrific reintroduction for the Ghoul. You have been missed, you rotten old creep. Welcome back!

[Link: Criswell Predicts]

[Link: SOUTH SEA CARTOONS compiled & edited by Harold Myers]

[Link: Ballyhoo Magazine -- Hula Hula Number]

The best of the three by far was the first, Gone the Beachcomber, a float of Demerara 151 over Maraschino liqueur, 80-proof Demerara, lemon, lime, and passionfruit syrup. The Maraschino liqueur tended to obscure the other flavors, so I'd recommend cutting it back from 1/4 oz. to 1/8 oz. (1 tsp).

I followed it up with the Planter's Punch, which I topped with a flaming crouton stuck into a lime shell. With 3 tsp. of grenadine in the mix, the punch turned out far too sweet for my tastes. I had to 'shop the photo quite a bit to make the flame visible, but I think the contrasty colors make it look like it came out of an old brochure or postcard, so it's cool.

The final drink of the evening was the Tahitian, a combination of pineapple and lime juice, with 3 rums, which produced a very harsh-tasting, flat libation. I'm not sure what it was lacking, but it definitely needed something to lift it above the ordinary. It got better as the ice melted and diluted it, but I don't think I'll be making it again.

EXTERMINATE!!!

[Link: Happy Anniversary to Us]

[Link: How To Care For Your Monster, Part I, Part II][via Exclamation Mark]

[Link: The Looking Good System]

Hanford Lemoore exacts his horrible revenge on Dr. Tiki (from Tiki Bar TV) at Forbidden Island in Alameda with this extremely clever prank involving the house jukebox.

Until today, I had been hitherto unawares of the phenomenon known as "Rickrolling". Suffice it to say that it involves Rick Astley, which should be enough to give any right-thinking person an unpleasant clenching sensation in the depths of their bowels.

[Link: How I Rickrolled Dr. Tiki]

1/2 oz. 10 Cane Rum
1/2 oz. Ron Matusalem Gran Reserva
1/2 oz. Lemon Hart Demerara (80 proof)
1/4 oz. Luxardo Maraschino Liqueur
6 drops Absinthe
1 oz. unsweetened pineapple juice
1/2 oz. fresh lime juice
1/2 oz. rock candy syrup
Dash of orange bitters

Pour all ingredients in blender with 1/2 cup of crushed ice and blend for no more than 5 seconds. Pour into specialty glass and fill with more crushed ice.

It was stupendous. The Luxardo gives this drink a really funky aftertaste of bitter almonds and musk, while the Absinthe, as is its wont, opens up the drink and makes each component stand out distinctly. I had to restrain myself from making an entire pitcher of them and putting 5 pounds back on overnight.

As a former art student, I can't tell you how tedious (and typically batshit insane) the attention-junkies behind these sorts of political "art" statements can be, as well as the professors who encourage them. All I wanted to do was learn how to paint, draw, and illustrate. Instead, I got 3 years of forced indoctrination. UItimately, I had to transfer to a tech college and get an electronics degree in order to clear my brain.

[Link: Close Cover Before Striking]

[Link: The Ghost Goes Gear]

Here's a couple of clips from the film that feature the SDG and a very young Winwood (in his pajamas) doin' their Sixties Groove Thang, along with a fine blue-eyed soul raveup from another band featured in the film, The St. Louis Union:

[Link: Nobody Loves You When You're Down and Out]
[Link: When I Come Home]
[Link: English Tea]