We took a short cab ride over around 6:30pm. The restaurant is in a huge building across the street from some sort of space museum that's got a full-size replica of a Mercury/Redstone rocket and the Chinese Shenzhou spacecraft sitting in the parking lot. Wish I'd had more time to check that out, but I was on a very important mission to overindulge all of my senses with too much food, drink, and raunchy entertainment. The outside of the building was anchored by a giant wooden gate festooned with lanterns. The entranceway was lined with cages filled with various types of birds that I assumed were destined to be on my plate. The foyer held a pyramid of aquariums that contained a multitude of tasty fishies in various shapes and sizes.

The waitress, who was dressed in traditional northeastern garb, led us to one of the bright-red picnic tables that filled the large interior of the restaurant. The walls were covered with old propaganda posters from the Cultural Revolution along with yellowed newspapers, also from the 1960s. I was pleased to note that the table had an unobstructed view of the stage.

I put myself at the mercy of Ronnie and Kelvin and let them get busy ordering a wide array of dishes with the help and advice of the friendly waitress. While they pondered our dining options, I played with the friendly white cat that was frolicking with what looked to be a small dead animal underneath our table. I think that all restaurants should have a cat, but I could've done without the deceased critter.

We had some tea and munched on the sunflower seeds that were in a bowl on the table. Our dinner began arriving within a few minutes. We started off with a bowl of smoked beef in a sweet sauce and a plate of sliced cabbage and tiny, orange needle mushrooms in a very light dressing that was faintly reminiscent of coleslaw. We then were brought a very odd looking dish of greenish-yellow globs of some gelatinous substance that tasted vaguely like Elmer's Glue. Ronnie informed me that this was boiled "cow foot". Ummm, bovine hooves! Fortunately, our beers had arrived by then, so I had something to rinse the taste out of my mouth. This was followed by a large plate of ribs coated in a crunchy, spicy batter and then lightly fried. I'd never eaten ribs with chopsticks before, but I managed. After that, we were served some kind of roasted bird that I first assumed was duck, but eventually I noticed the tiny, severed head of a pigeon lying on the plate. Finally, a boiling pot of perch and tofu stew brought our feast to an end. The price of all this gluttony, you ask? A mere $22.

At 7:30 sharp, the lights on the stage came up and a gentleman attired in a mandarin's robe and skullcap came out and warmed us up with a few jokes. Kelvin informed me that he was a classic Chinese comedic character. He was soon joined by a lovely companion who regaled us with song in an incredibly shrill Betty Boopish voice, while accompanied by the comedian on an equally high-pitched coronet. The volume of the PA system was earsplitting and crackled with distortion. The combined effect of her voice, the horn, and the PA gave me an instant migraine. Fortunately, it was soon over, and the two of them proceeded to perform an elegant fan dance followed by a sad song about a woman forced to marry a blind beggar. They finished up the show with a wicked lampoon of Japanese soldiers in WWII. Long memories, these folks.

We were totally stuffed and feeling a bit tipsy at this point, so we settled the bill and walked across the bridge over the busy highway to the taxi stand. The restaurant was beautifully lit, so I snapped a picture. We caught a cab, and I said goodby to my colleagues at the hotel. What a pleasant evening!

Tomorrow is my last full day here. A fellow instructor arrives from the US tonight, so I'll bring him with me to the office on Friday to show him the ropes. Lin Tzu is taking all of us out to lunch at a Peking Duck restaurant, then I'll have the afternoon off to do some last-minute shopping downtown in the Wangfujing area.

This has really been a great trip, one of the best of my career. I'm sorry to see it end, but I miss my family.

P.S. I had an especially odd moment of cross-cultural cross-ideological, cognitive dissonance today when riding in the taxi on the way back from work. A old, green, military motorcycle with a sidecar pulled up next to us at a stoplight. On it, were two women wearing gray Mao jackets and black leather pants, with designer purses slung over their arms. Rammstein was blaring from the stereo!

Be afraid. Be very afraid.